Friday, December 5, 2014

Screenshot Trivia #3

Screenshot #1
Too easy but kind of obscure. I think you can deduce the movie from this screenshot. But it will hopefully inspire some to revisit this fine movie.

Pipeliner


This song is finally in the ballpark for a demo version complete with my vocal effect unit that makes me sound like Kermit the Frog. It sucks having the soul of Jackson Browne and the the voice of Pee Wee Herman but the good lord may shine his love upon me one day and inspire a pretty, popular artist to record one of my songs.

Pipeliner was intended to get me thinking outside the box, a love song from the wife of a dead pipeline welder, a tribute to the working man from the female perspective. I demonstrated my ability to write totally noncommercial novelty songs but Pipeliner is as commercial as I can make it: pro oil, pro capitalism, pro working class, pro traditional family...(I'm still working on a lyric about his dog and truck but I made up for it with a line about his Lincoln Welder)...except I'm a man singing it for my gay welder husband. Damn it, please let Taylor Swift hear this and record it and put "Written by Oggy Bleacher" on her platinum album! Please GOD LET THAT HAPPEN so I can retire to Belize with the royalties of this cheese fest. Is that asking too much?

And lest ye judge me need I remind you of the years spent in the oil field freezing with no fat on my ass, nothing to protect me from the Louisiana hippie haters and mud up to my balls trying desperately to inject the earth with poisoned frac water.
The flood lights aren't up, because I haven't put them up yet.
I work next to these pipefitters, welders, electricians, concrete form setters, engineers. Fucking 4 stories in the air with a bitter wind in my face on an extending crane swaying in the breeze with a giant light assembly dangling from my lips. Many die, many widows are made, many lunches and next to work boots that will never be worn again. In fact, the work boots I own are from a man who could no longer walk after a life in the oil field. He could not put the boots on...so he sold them. IF THERE IS A GOD THEN HE WILL LET TAYLOR SWIFT RECORD THIS SONG! AMEN.

tree shadow

Hhahaa, I just realize the whole song should end with 'Amen' because that's even more American than a widow of a pipeliner singing a song to her dead husband. The Pipeliner Tribute Song.


ps. my piano lick is inspired by, but not an exact rip-off of, Jackson Browne's Birds of Saint Marks. So he doesn't get writing credit.

The chords are the standard C/ami/F/G...the chorus is F/G/ami and the bridge is ami/G. I rewrote the lyrics from what I sing but this is what I've got so far:

Pipeliner
By Oggy Bleacher

It's 4am, I'll make the coffee.
You can sleep a little more.
I'll put your lunch
with your work boots
beside the kitchen door

chorus: Pipeliner, when are you coming home.
You've been gone so long
I'll be waiting for you when the day is through
I'll be waiting here for you.

In the field the work is hard the day is long
your Lincoln Welder is your pride
Another bead around another mile of pipe
you're never satisfied

chorus

bridge: you and I we had so many years together
you were a lover and a friend
now the days are long, the nights are deathly quiet
and in the morning I pretend

It's 4am, I'll make the coffee
you can sleep a little more.
I'll put your lunch
with your work boots beside the kitchen door

chorus.

It's simple, a video of Taylor Swift singing and a sepai-toned widow making coffee for her dead husband, a dog waiting sadly at the door next to some work boots, an American Flag. That's a Platinum record right there courtesy of Oggy Bleacher. No, let's have more booty jiggle videos. yeah. I'll go ahead and starve to death.

Slap in Face

America: the country where you can be considered too mentally ill to execute after murdering your in-laws, but you can be lawfully murdered by the police for selling loose cigarettes.

The best comment I read about the state sanctioned street execution of Eric Garner was when one Conservative scumbag wrote, "Garner wasn't exactly the picture of health."

A bleeding-heart Liberal kiss-ass responded, "Yeah, a healthy person could have survived the beating."


Hahaha.

Comply or Die!

Creative Commons License
Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.