Tuesday, September 23, 2008

venice skills center

Part X in a day in the life:
the man in the van is all about self-enrichment. So taking a computer electronic repair class seems like the right move.

Glengarry

Part XVI in a day in the life:

The trick with anything is to practice. So here's another shot at the Ricky Roma monologue. The man in the van wants to get the words right, but not imitate Al Pacino and also to add a little bit of his own personality. One of these days he'll get the whole package and be satisfied.

Gustavo

Part XV in a day in the life:

Gustavo is from Chile and plays the guitar. He's an aspiring director and an all around upstanding dude. The man in the van needs a cameraman so he isn't always holding the camera two feet from his face so everyone can look up his nostrils. the man in the van isn't stupid...he knows that isn't a great angle. So what's the solution. At least for a bit find someone to hold the camera. At least for the Final Warning music video.


crossroad blues

Part XIV in a day in the life

Why not pay tribute to the original blues man...Robert johnson. That man lived in his fair share of vans and suffered for us all. He passed this gem down and it only truly sounds right when played by a man on the street. You sing with heart and you will go far. Too bad the man in the van isn't talented enough to make it on broadway, because he'd sing this song like a man done wrong by the boss.

The man in the van is at a kind of crossroads. Take a right and go to jail, take a left and end up a corpse in the gutter. What to do? Ain't we all just looking for a way to the source? Like Dorothy, we're clicking our heels and asking to go home. Then the hand of God comes down and crashes your commuter train into a freight train and you go flying through the air at 40 mph and crash into a pile of briefcases and seats that have been torn up. And you split your head open and lie under a burning hunk of insulation. There's no way to know when you number will be called!


final warning part 2

Part XIII in a day in the life:

Here's some footage of the second verse of Final Warning, the man in the van's protest song directed at the Riviera Ave Neighborhood watch association. The reality is that the RANWA is probably just one old bitter man who is trying to sell his house so is afraid buyers will be run off when they see the man in the van squatting on the sidewalk taking a shit. Well, too bad, buddy. You can name yourself the "VENICE WANTS NO NIGGERS ASSOCIATION" and I still wouldn't give a fuck.

earning some change

This is around part XI in a day in the life

The man in the van found his piano fix for the day. After an hour of playing Burt Bacharach and easy listening hits from the '70s like Take this Ribbon from my hair, And I love You so, Weekend in New England, he got down and hit his stride. The Blues comes easy to a man living in his van.

He made $11 in an hour. But he gave $5 to the owner of the Piano, the dude dancing in the background who is named Nathan Pino. Pino plays some mean keys and makes about $50 in some good hours. I'll post some video of Nate playing the piano one day. Just enjoy!

Venice Beach

Part IX of a day in the life

Riding north on the boardwalk.
Venice Beach

Mayor of RV Lane

Part VIII of a day in the life:

Oh boy, there's one in every bunch. Dennis is the Messiah of RV lane...not the mayor. Well kind of both. Who knows? He's everything. The dude is driving around in...well, he's PUSHING a VW van.

Thing is broke down and busted up. Must be a 1971 van. Everything he owns is in it. I met him because he was pushing the van into a parking spot. I helped out.
And then it begins...his plan to save the world starting with an army of homeless people installing solar panels on top of every building in Venice. He says these visions come to him at night, "Like those flip story books"
Technically he's on the money...if only we didn't live in what he calls "The Fourth Reich" in which the Nazis have returned under disguise to kill all the poor and foreigners. Solar panel installation would take place, I presume, right after we are all gassed and buried in the caverns they have dug for this purpose in Nevada.
The man in the van has heard some wacky shit in his day, but Dennis was firing on all cylinders. We would steam clean the streets.
I guess the problem is that the poor are despicable people as far as most citizens are concerned. They would see us working as the massah sees the house nigger washing plates. It's a privilege for us to work for them. I say fuck them. Fuck their condescending attitudes. Fuck their Bentleys and their Chryslers and the BMWs. How about this for a novel idea: Let the rich wash OUR piss of the sidewalk. LOL. I will take a fat dump in the middle of the street and Donald Trump can come on over and clean it up. How about that?

J.O.B.S

Part VII of a day in the life:

When the movie called J.O.B.S comes out then you will know where you saw the writer and star. This cool cat came out and said, "Shit you gonna be cutting up black people with that saw?"
We had a good chat and then he started harassing the women in the women's shelter next door ("You got a baby? You want one?") LOL

Well, you gotta take the good with the bad. HE could talk all day if I let him..and I let him talk a little too long. If you turn it off before the end then you will be in good company.
His screenplay was called "Jump Out Boys." Get it. J.O.B.S He said it was like Fight Club meets Reservoir Dogs. I said, "It's a westcoast Godfather!" And he agreed, though what that means was not clear.

Shit, it was about a drug dealer who sells pussy and gets busted because his choices were bad. My man kept saying "It's about choices." He claimed to be Al Jarreau's cousin. Living on the street. Selling busted sun umbrellas. Everyone always says that these colorful characters will make a good screenplay. Well, take a good look. Is this something you'd watch? Or pay money to watch. It gets boring after ten seconds. Why? Because these characters are stereotypes. One is a hustler. The other is a dweeb. What the fuck do they have to talk about? Nothing. So where is this movie going (the one with the dweeb and the hustler?) would it be like Pineapple Express? Sort of stoner odd couple? Bullshit.
I'm not buying drugs from him at the beginning, I'm paying him because he is a broke person riding around looking for work and hustling for change. I'm interviewing him and taking his time so he gets a buck.

George in his element

Part VI of a day in the life:

Here's George in his zone bullshitting the city on the phone. No one can sling shit like George.
This hot tub has seen some crazy times but everything must come to an end. I was the last one to see it in the house with water in it so it is fitting that I'm the one to finally toss it into the garbage. Cutting it in half was not ceremonial...the City is coming to pick it up and needs it in two pieces so it will fit in the truck. The hardest part was the pvc pipe. Not to mention the man in the van is using a saw that is more suited for cutting small twigs. But it's low resource!

Hot Tub Cutting Party

Part V of A Day in the life

What's a day without cutting a hot tub in half? Not a day the man in the van wants any part of.

Lincoln Place

Part IV in a day in the life:

The last of the affordable housing in Venice...sold out and in litigation because...gasp...the deal was illegal and destroyed many lives. But Fuck them..they were only blacks and Mexicans.


Litter picking

Part III in A day in the life.
Help the man in the van clean up the world. Keep your trash where in belongs...in Congress and the White House!

RV LANE

PART II in the DAY IN THE LIFE. 3rd street asleep.


Morning With the Man in The Van

Wake up sleepy head! The Cops are coming!

This is the first installment of A DAY IN THE LIFE OF THE MAN IN THE VAN
Creative Commons License
Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.