Monday, September 25, 2017

Captain America

What's not to love?

Friday, September 22, 2017

Gold Dreams

Desperate Times

It angers me that 50 hours a week working for the federal government means I have to pan for gold in order to make money for groceries. One of the most painful lessons in this world is that working hard and doing a good job means absolutely jack shit in the quality of life department. It probably means you're being exploited to shit and will be disposed of. The trick is to do absolutely nothing and fool everyone into thinking that you are worth money. Facebook employees spring to mind as their ridiculous salaries inflate property values beyond what a plumber or carpenter can ever afford in Palo Alto. You know, because social media is WAY more important than plumbing and buildings that don't collapse. Our priorities are fucked like Jesus.

A simple operation

So, I staked a claim and got to work. I'm flat broke and staring down the barrel of a knee operation that will either put me in debt or force me to move to Morocco.

Anyone know where I can sell gold?
How long does it take to pan a few flakes of gold? A long time. Hours and hours. It's worth about $8 and my knees are worse than ever.

Saturday, September 2, 2017

Craft Day

suede hatchet cover
This kind of craft project is simple. Find a suede jacket in the storage unit/trailer park where you work fishing shit from the nasty swimming pool. Take the suede jacket from the dumpster after you are told to throw everything out of a rent-delinquent storage unit. Save that jacket until you need a cover for your recently sharpened axe. Then cut the pocket from the jacket and put on a snap so the axe head fits in the pocket and snaps closed. The hatchet took a little finesse but I came to my senses before I used shearling fur. I wanted to use Alligator leather so my hatchet cover could eat better than Honduran orphans but I didn't have enough.
Creative Commons License
Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.