Wednesday, August 12, 2009

Time flies

Returned to Todos Santos to see if it was any cooler here. But it isn`t. Hot and buggy and humid. Anywhere would be better than this desert. I can`t believe it is mid august. The grey hair on my beard tells me that I`m not getting any younger. Why is that? But I`m also getting wiser. So that is the evil exchange we all make. ALright, hold your wisecracks about me not getting wiser. I figured out the problem, as though any one cares. See, the environmental crimes committed by humanity have to be punished. It`s like Dostoyevski. Crime and Punishment. Every crime must be punished. I`m not so existential and nihilistic that nothing matters. So if a sea turtle chokes and dies on a hannah montana doll head or some fucking plastic backpack that goes on a shitty bike...then that has to be punished. IF you don`t agree then we are talking about two different philosophies and YOU DON`T UNDERSTAND ME. So, who do you punish if thousands of turtles are dying because we all use plastic bags and horrible shit that ends up in the ocean? How do you punish humanity when all the governments of the world just want their countries to progress into some kind of Blade Runner future where plastic is outlawed and there are no sea turtles? Sorry, that was a loaded question. My point is that when there is no one to punish, when punishment must be so huge that it is inconceivable, then those with my obsessive nature will do the drastic thing and PUNISH THEMSELVES. See, someone has to be punished and if no one can be punished then I will punish myself. I think that sort of gets to what Chris McCandless was doing for two years on the road. He felt his family had committed a crime of fidelity and honesty and that humanity was also destructive but no one could be punished so he punished himself. Some people have the luxury of being so unsophisticated that THEY ACTUALLY DON^T CARE ABOUT CRIMES AGAINST HUMANITY. Well, that must be nice.
So, having internalized the geniocide and cultural massacre that is being perpetrated in Iraq (Dominos Pizza in Baghdad) I have suffered and all the joy has left my life. IT is voluntary and perhaps indescribably arrogant to just about every person I have talked to, but that is my explanation. Like it or not. I operate under the moral philosophy that all crimes must be punished. But that philosophy creates pure havoc when the crime is so monumental that it can never be punished except by God, who WOULD NEVER ALLOW IT TO HAPPEN IN THE FIRST PLACE IF HE EXISTED. WHY PUNISH SOMETHING AFTER THE FACT? THAT`S COMPLETELY IDIOTIC.
Now, my current task is to accept that I have been punished for something that I was a part of (The wholesale destruction of cultures and enviroments via hannah montana products) but that I may as well be dead if my life is only going to be a vessel of sacrifice and penitence. Can I ignore the steady decline of civilizations? Can I overlook the plight of the sea turtle? I don`t know. Drugs do not help...they just make me lonely and sad...beer does not help. Nothing helps because the facts still remain that mankind has run amok and is being so careless with resources and life that only an idiot can watch Tropic Thunder and laugh at Ben Stiller`s monkey like behavior. What kind of a culture allows Hannah Montana and Tropic Thunder films? It is repulsive. But to introduce those monstrosities to other cultures like Iraq and Mexico is proof that America is a cancerous, parasitic, pseudo culture that lives only to devour other authentic cultures and replace them with some kind of surrogate, phony piece of plastic shit that was INVENTED IN A BOARD ROOM with "Culture Reinvention" stenciled on the door.

So fuck all of you. I am going to write like a demon unleashed on the world and every word I write will be a satire or attack on that which I believe is vomitous and repulsive. It will make no difference and sea turtles will continue to die and I will be a hypocrite in the fact that I will take part in a culture and mode of communication with animals that ignore the plight of sea turtles and seals and eagles and small monkeys who live simply in trees and are hunted by monsters in trucks. Fuck all of you who devour the earth. I will undercut your endeavors will all my heart. You will be ashamed to eat your daily bread. I curse you and your blighted families. May your coffee be bitter. May your sperm whither and die in the shaft of your cock. IT is high time for a dystopian novel. Don`t you agree? Who better to write it?
I have suffered long enough and now you will suffer. it is your turn on the Hannah Montana cross.
Yes, I have walked an unusual and unpleasant and unenviable path. But it has introduced me to unusual people and I have come to some unusual conclusions. These conclusions are original and they are shocking and they, admittedly, have no place on this planet. But that is why they must be shared with the world, even if the world is hardly worth communicating with.
You think, "All three people who will read this post?" Yes, them. BEcause you see that it does not matter if a million or ten million read this post. So to my mind this is a philosophical battle and it makes no difference, in effect, how widely dispersed my philosophy is. Why should it? The sea turtles themselves don`t really care if I am their patron. They don`t care but still I act on their behalf by sticking my finger in a dike with a million rotting holes that spew filth on their home. IF they could speak they would say "Dude, it`s too little too late." And I would say, that philosophically I still must act. Philosophically, a culture that manufactures Hannah Montana to sell fake plastic cell phones with Hannah Montana stickers on them must be called out and mocked openly. This is a mountain of shit that has no purpose. At least the Egyptians created the pyramids! What the fuck is a two dollar plastic belt with "I like boys." spelled in rhinestones going to do? End up in the ocean where an animal will swallow it and die. IF you are not repulsed by this then the chances are you are not the animal who is going to choke on a hannah montana backpack.
I am repulsed by it...and more things than I can list. But hopefully I will list them all in my dystopian novel. I`ll call it "HANNAH MONTANA ATE MY CULTURE WITH HER CUNT AND SHIT OUT A PILE OF AMERICA"
ha ha.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

my take on chris mcCandless is that his story was good for hollywood. Young douche that got in over his head.

Oggy Bleacher said...

ok. he got in over his head. Great. now, let`s actually examine WHY HE GOT IN OVER HIS HEAD. that is the story, which Sean Penn tried and failed to address in his hamfisted reenactment of some EVENTS IN THE KID`S LIFE. There is a difference between what happened and WHY IT HAPPENED. Yes, he got in over his head...but HE WANTED TO GET IN OVER HIS HEAD. What drives a person to that extreme? If you haven`t felt that irrational impulse then his actions will seem inexplicable. But the pieces of the puzzle are all there and I invite you to analyze those pieces and discuss them here.
I submit to you that he was punishing himself for crimes against humanity by humanity and also crimes against his family committed by his family. No tribunal could judge these perceived crimes so he punished himself with voluntary isolation and hardship and exile and penitence. That`s the lesson I get from it. No, he didn`t plan to die in Alaska, but he didn`t plan on surviving either. It was an extreme sentence that he delievered on himself because the crimes could not go unpunished. He repeatedly celebrates Dostoyevski`s Crime and Punishment. Does that sound like a guy who just got over his head because he couldn`t cross some rapids and ate some poisonous berries. no. Don`t dismiss the story because of the ending. He was, in his head, correcting some grave misdeed that no one else could even understand. McCandless himself probably was years away from recognizing the root cause for what he was doing. And would it have mattered? It is hard to say. What do you think?

Anonymous said...

yeah..chris really showed us! He really GOT america and had the last laugh. Who's laughing now? Idiot.

Oggy Bleacher said...

ok. you might have failed philosophy 101 at community college but I'm going to ask you to think outside your four white walls at a world where ideas actually matter more than the cost of a double cheeseburger. I say he was punishing himself for crimes against humanity and you say he was trying to get back at America by punishing himself. Either way, you think that's something he was laughing about? It's funny? Like a joke? Like David Letterman? Like he would blog about it and make people laugh because he was suffering for perceived crimes against humanity? Come on. Should I remind you that Into The Wild was a book written ABOUT him and not BY him? He didn't make a single public comment about his opinions. I am of different stock and feel my opinions are more important and must be spread like fertile seeds across the land until all people bend to my will. So don't confuse me with Chris. I merely use his memory for my own devices. But using his death as proof that he was not thinking clearly is a good way to justify your useless existence. Enjoy your Starbucks coffee you impotent corporate whore!
Ha! Now I'm laughing. Me. I am laughing. I got the last laugh.

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Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.