Saturday, April 9, 2011

Cathedral Respect By JC Penny

In honor of Easter and Catholicism in general I commissioned JC Penny to make me this limited edition 85% Arnel 15% Nylon Cathedral Tribute Shirt.* (Putting nylon and arnel together is like putting bacon on a ham sandwich)
I think they did ok but I can't figure out which cathedral they printed on the fabric. Is it The Duomo in Florence or St Mark's Basilica in Venice or a composite of several different ones. Any opinions?

This is the Duomo Plaza in Florence, I think. The arched doorways are on my shirt.

This is a picture of one of those hack job cathedrals they put together back in 1400. I mean, where's the pride in workmanship? They probably hired Greeks to do the labor and got shafted by a crooked contractor. It looks like it'll fall over in a stiff wind. Probably came in a DIY kit from Home Depot. "Just Add Glue"

I wrote a song about cathedrals but can't figure out a word that rhymes with apostle...

*It's impossible to take a flash picture of this shirt because the Arnel deflects about 100% of all light along with 95% of all female humans born after 1959. I think it is bulletproof too like Frodo's Elven-mail! They stopped production of it back in disco time because it was probably toxic. It had nothing to do with the cathedral print! hahahahaha. I feel like everything manufactured today will be proven to be something akin to asbestos and will have to be encased in concrete and shot into space...including my underwear! hahahaha


Ken said...


Oggy Bleacher said...

In his tweed shroud
Jesus made his toast
playing tennis with an apostle
Mary's tits stood proud
John made pot roast
and Judas drank a snapple
Ooooh, Judas drank a snapple!

Can you help me something that rhymes with "Back Pain"

Creative Commons License
Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.