Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Taco Bell Manager Gives Inane Pep Talk to Crew

Darwin Sheffield, night manager at Taco Bell #3288 in Indianapolis, Indiana gave a mid-December Pep talk to his crew on Monday Night, sensing a lapse in critical judgement, enthusiasm and "urgency" among his employees.
"Let's step up to bat," urged Sheffield, wearing a striped gold tie and tan trousers. "We're almost through Christmas," he added.
Crew members shrugged and rolled their eyes at one another as the "employee meeting" continued.
"I like what you've done so far this December, especially Todd at the cashier," said Sheffield with his trademark false grin. "That Santa hat you wore the other night was great."
Todd looked sheepishly around the stock room before his manager said, "Way to go, Todd!" and started to clap. No one joined in and the applause quickly died out.
"Darwin has these emergency staff meetings. I don't know. Maybe he's required to by law," explained Frank "Hot Sauce" Mason, who has worked at the Taco Bell for two months. "Half the time I have no idea what he's talking about."
"But," continued Sheffield with a dramatic pause, "There's room for improvement. Doug! Remember when that customer service incident came up on Sunday?"
Doug "Steak and Bake" Baker nodded himself awake in the corner near the walk in freezer door. "Totally."
"What improvements could you have made?" asked the Manager and when Doug's pause began to get uncomfortable he added, "I don't want to put you on the spot. I think everyone can benefit from this, we can learn from it, grow and improve as a team."
"Yeah, I guess I dropped the ball on that. This customer wanted to exchange something for something and I...I don't know. I made it harder than it had to be," said Doug vaguely.
"Thanks, Doug. Remember, 'Who is always right?'
The rhetorical question hung in the air like the steam over the tortilla heater until Sheffield answered it himself. "The customer is always right."
Does anyone have anything to add?
A man who everyone called John but whose real name is Jack considered asking for a day off next week, but decided against it. Better to call in sick, he figured.


Jules said...

Those nicknames are hideous Oggy, but you are adorable.

Anonymous said...

good stuff. i just stumbled on your site - someone today said something about being "the man in the van" from a service perspective - you know like the geek squad or something so i googled it and you came up. thanks for the moment of zen

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Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.