Saturday, August 25, 2012

Magic Mike

My easiest decision of the week was which $1 movie to see on Friday Night. It was like a menu of apocalyptic signs: Abraham Lincoln The Vampire Hunter or Magic Mike (male striptease formula movie). Let there be no doubt that the Puritan utopia the passengers of The Mayflower hoped to cultivate in the new world has come and gone, replaced by the depths of purile and peasant mockery.

The Abe movie was in 3D and I didn't want to wear glasses so I went to the stripper movie. I'm secure in my own sexuality. If Matthew McConaughey can prance around in spandex and an elephant nose cock sleeve then I can watch him do that. It was no Gone With The Wind

I was indifferent to the movie because it was a formula stolen from every afternoon special I've ever seen: Hero meets new kid. Kid has protective pretty sister. Hero's lifestyle repulses Sister. Kid turns to the dark side. Hero realizes his relationships are shallow and abandons lifestyle for hopeful sex with sister.

Yawn. But director Steven Soderberg saved this flick from the trash heap because he actually decided to force the actors to act. Long dance sequences are shot without cuts. Dialogue is directed mostly in a theatrical setting. He showed cock. MM's shaved ass fills the screen at one point. He was professional about the directing and the movie is not as horrible as the script. I'll go watch Abe kill zombies another night.

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Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.