"Tell Mrs. Forrer she isn't getting her penguin pencil holder"
This message came to me anonymously from someone in Denver who seems to have the wrong number. Either that or I'm living an alternate life while I sleep...but mistakenly am using the same phone for both lives. I wonder if my alternative life is more interesting since I'm a message taker for unsophisticated things like penguin pencil holders. Maybe I'm more content in my other life. Maybe I share videos of cats playing with dogs. I should text back and say, "You better give Mrs. Forrer her penguin pencil holder back or I'm going to kick your ass."
But I'm afraid it will reflect badly on my alternate persona.
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