Monday, June 30, 2014

Oggy's Latest Word on Gun Control

I think I have a good approach this time because it is both condescending and also pseudo-enlightened. I get an ear full of 2nd amendment nuts quite a bit in Texas and I'm always looking for a way to shut them up because there is no way a civilized nation would indiscriminately sell assault rifles and grenades. Yes, the law allows it but the seller has the last responsibility. I've seen people more guarded about selling their guitars. "I want it to go to a good home." A FUCKING GUITAR! But an assault rifle? "Shit, if the credit card company accepts the charge then you can wrap it up and take it home. I don't give a fuck what you do with it." AN ASSAULT RIFLE!
Someone wanted to buy my Original Vintage Honda Twinstar motorcycle to turn it into a cafe racer and I told him to get some chopped mufflers and stick them in his ass. And that was a crappy motorcycle but I have STANDARDS, which most gun sellers couldn't spell. So this is my latest piece of hand slapping to the lazy assholes who sell guns. It would be a supreme victory to piss one of them off so much that he guns me down in the street like a dog. "How dare you tell me to think for myself?" 
If I were trying to sell an assault rifle I would have so many requests and stipulations and demands and questions that the person would probably give up first. We'd have to go on a camping trip Baffin Island...we'd have to work in a homeless shelter for a year. All to give me an idea of what kind of person they are. If I still approved of them and trusted them at the end of the trial period I'd probably still not sell it to them because it's a frivolous possession. A hundred assault rifles will not protect you during the next apocalypse.
There's a particular professor here on campus that is going to get a copy of this stapled to his 2nd amendment rants that he has stapled to the wall.

Gun Rights Proponents win the debate not on the strength of their argument but by default. The Genie can not be put back in the bottle; guns are here to stay as 200 years of reckless trade ensures the worst criminal elements in America are likely armed. That status can't be overlooked and no legislation will fix it.

Gun control arguments are two centuries too late. Unlike drugs, which have a shelf life, guns and their deadly purpose are passed down for decades. Overturning the 2nd amendment to the Constitution would have no good effect for at least two generations. But those who see every gun empowered school massacre as predestined due to violence inherent in humans don't do their cause any favors. The status quo must change and since disarmament is now impossible, everyone must prepare to defend themselves. I accept that path but I'm not happy about it. It's a sign of failure that we've accepted a citizenry involved in an Arms Race against each other. There is one alternative but it involves self-reflection from the stubborn purveyors of deadly weapons so it's not likely to happen.

The problem won't be solved by a government deciding whom can buy what, but when sellers themselves set their own standards. Sellers don't want anyone regulating their trade, including themselves. They are lazy capitalists, buying low and selling high, ignoring the buyer's intent and focusing on the money. They engage not in "free" trade but in stupid trade. Gun dealers don't cause crime but they do fail to prevent it. They learned their crooked salesmanship ethics from tweaking meth dealers.

The cowardly sellers denounce every law regulating their enterprise but as soon as someone goes on a rampage with one of the guns they sold they immediately hide behind the tired excuse: "The buyer passed all required background checks...etc." Well, which is it? Are these sellers mature enough to make their own choices or do they require big daddy government to hold their hands and accept blame? They can't have it both ways and the bloody tradition of praying sellers exercise some judgement of their own is a complete failure. Like newly minted teenagers, they are so busy defending their right to be autonomous that they neglected to make up their own rules.

Next week: I will explain why media is a virtual Good Cop/Bad Cop campaign attacking your mental health. The working title is "Why The Media is Gang-Raping Your Grandmother's Corpse."
Creative Commons License
Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.