Tuesday, March 17, 2015

Van Love

The old back support and the new Seat.

I had this particular project in mind actually since I bought the van in 2008. But one thing was always getting in my way and I was slowly becoming helpless to resist the "Ethic of The Van" and the whole mindset of a hobo on wheels, loathed, gnashing his teeth at pedestrians, getting handcuffed with his shirt off, beer belly flapping in the wind, dirty underpants waistband slightly askew and folded wrong, folded so the elastic turns like when you see an old woman's panties showing and can see the tag, heartbreaking, old faded tattoos on his neck, his bead necklace (Something his girlfriend made for him in Mexico) getting broken by police scuffles. So fucking funny, but the seats were leading me in that direction, washing butt crack in Subway water fountains, shitting in newspaper.

The whole "Van Life" was digesting simple Oggy and turning him into something like a monster. Remember in Pirates of The Caribbean II, and III? How Davey Jones's ship had a crew of sailors who had pledged 100 years before the sail, on Davey Jones's ship The Flying Dutchman...instead of death...but over time, like Bootblack Bill, they became part of the Ship. "Part of the crew, part of the ship," was the mantra they were chanting at the very end of III when they made Will the captain...remember? Or Am I just babbling? My fucking point is that I was becoming part of the Van. See, it was dictating my habits and my appearance rather than the other way around. It's like I'd become the reincarnation of the original owners and they were possessing me. I guess that's what the movie Christine was like, except my concept is more like when I drive the van I experience life as the previous owners...that would be an interesting time machine movie...the van is so old that every time I drive it I relieve the exact memories of some previous owner and little by little a story is told...and that means someone in the future will relive my memories...god help them. It's like this van is the hotel in The Shining and eventually I will go crazy and be absorbed into the fabric of the van and someone will later own it and be remodeling and think they see a human face embedded in the dashboard, but then it will fade and they will think it was just the way the light was hitting the windshield and reflecting someone's face outside, though there is no one outside. That face will be mine, fading into the dashboard.

This back support was the original pleather from 1969 so I had to keep it. But the new bottom looks good.

So I'm taking control back and making changes to the appearance of the van rather than the other way around. I'm not possessed by the demon spirit controlling my van. No!

Took the awful dashboard off. New doghouse cover.
 I don't think I'll put the old dashboard on. I know I could get it recovered and figure out how to put the 5 nuts back on holding it in place and it would look good. But it looks good now. The dashboard added nothing.
Simple metal lines with no foam dashboard
IT feels good to get a different look. The van's ignition problems have been mitigated too, so I think the best thing to do is go further south, to keep searching for some utopia where they don't imprison people wrongly and politicians are honest and lawyers tell the truth and never speculate on anything...I'll keep driving with my piano and guitars and new upholstery. El Conquistador rides again!

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Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.