Friday, June 26, 2015

Confederacy of Dunces

Raise your hand if you're an idiot...

Forrest: (voice-over) Now, when I was a baby, Momma named me after the great Civil War hero, General Nathan Bedford Forrest... She said we was related to him in some way. And, what he did was, he started up this club called the Ku Klux Klan. They'd all dress up in their robes and their bedsheets and act like a bunch of ghosts or spooks or something. They'd even put bedsheets on their horses and ride around. And anyway, that's how I got my name. Forrest Gump. Momma said that the Forrest part was to remind me that sometimes we all do things that, well, just don't make no sense. 

 The thing about the Confederate Flag is that it sets up a paradox, where someone flying it says they believe in State Sovereignty....but they enjoy the Federal Protection to fly the flag without having their house burned down.

See, I'm in favor of total and complete sovereignty. If you want to dress up in a white dress and parade around then that should be allowed, but another person with different views should be able to unload a Bushmaster clip into your crowd. I see it as only fair, because the flag represents this kind of "we're so sovereign that we don't need the Union" attitude. And I respect that. In fact, I respect it so much that I think the Union should ignore any retaliation against people who feel they are above the need for Union protection.

It's a hypocritical debate to suggest one is sovereign, yet, demand protection from the governing body that one has rebelled against. I realize this is far too philosophic for the Whataburger, Chick-Fil-A-fat-fuck-in-a-white-dress crowd, but I'm not going to take the time to explain it.

I would prefer that the matter be settled by bullets and bombs and nooses rather than the ineffective court of public opinion. If you fly the flag of racist idiots who seceded from the Union then you have declared your sovereignty and renounce the protection and benefits of the union. I respect that. And I welcome it because you have renounced any claims to protection and the Union will merely watch your house burn down, since to interfere would be an infringement of your sovereignty....and that would be too horrible to mention...so they won't interfere. That works for me. You fly the confederate flag? Then it's open season on you.

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Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.