5 minutes in Lowes made me suffocate

I pretty much fell to my knees in relief when I left Lowes WITHOUT a job. Only the Epcot center is more artificial than that fucking miserable place. To assemble lawn furniture and barbecue grills all day there would be like jumping into a bin of rusty nails and at the bottom of the bin is a quarter and the only food in the entire world is those stale gumballs and my job would be to impale myself on the nails to get the quarter and then go eat the gumballs. My hands were trembling as I filled out the application. The interviewer could tell I was sweating and just shook his head. I hugged him and fled. I've failed to get hired for more jobs in the past three months than in the last 40 years. It is raining but I huddled in the shelter of the church singing Irish carols for spare change. I thought, by no practical yardstick is this [life] working out. I'm going to Guatemala. Fuck this bullshit.