Wednesday, March 10, 2010

Bush Surprised to Learn He is No Longer President

Former president George W. Bush was speechless when he learned he was no longer president during a luncheon on Tuesday.
"Wha, wha, what?" stammered the 43rd president.
The luncheon, a meeting of The Texas Ranch Owner's Association took place in the Houston Civic Center and witnesses described the former president as "dignified and stately" before the speeches began. During the first course of the lunch someone at his table asked the former president his opinions on current president Barak Obama. The former president smiled slyly, "He'd make a good president."
Several diners at the table chuckled until Bush grew serious.
"No, I'm serious. When my term ends in 2012 I bet Barak will be tough competition for McCain or Guiliani. But hey, it won't be my problem! One of the Clinton's will probably get the nomination anyway."
The diners claim Bush's wife Laura leaned over to her husband's ear and whispered something.
It was then that Bush's face fell and he stammered. When he regained his composure he asked,
"What about the committee meetings? What about the calls to Cheney? What about...what about Iraq? We're at war! Right? Who the fuck is running the country?"
Someone said that Barak Obama was the current leader of the free world.
"Well, when the hell did that happen? The way people had been treating me I thought shit was going fine," said the former president. "In 2008? You mean, over a year? Man, why didn't someone tell me?"
A diner who agreed to be interviewed if his name was not released said he reminded the president that he had been at the swearing in ceremony, standing next to Obama when he took the oath.
"That? That was a senator. That was the senator getting sworn in to the senate. Right?" He scanned the faces at the table. "Right?"
When the truth finally sunk in the former President said, "So, what does this mean? No more speeches, nothing?" He paused. "Well, that's perfect. More time for golf."
Bush didn't mention the incident again until he answered a concerned rancher's question with, "As president I will...I mean, as former president I will make your problems a priority."


Anonymous said...

Barbara is George I's wife. Laura is Baby Bush's wife....

Oggy Bleacher said...

We regret the error. We want the story to be as accurate as possible before being completely false.

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Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.