Tuesday, May 10, 2011

New York Groove

I'm at a loss how to make this trip from St. Louis to Labrador. I sought out Ace Frehley for some guidance but you can judge for yourself what advice he had.

The sad part is I had a few people ask me if I wanted a ride to New York. I turned them down because the bus ticket from NYC is as expensive as the ticket from here to NH. So I'd be paying gas money to get someone else home and then I pay double to get me from NYC north. no point. Now, I'm going to have to adjust my situation and see if I can chip in less to get to NYC so I can have some money left for the trip north.

Also, the point of the original documentary was to get from NYC times square where I interview people regarding the arctic wolf as oggy bleacher from the future and document the journey on foot to Ellesmere Island. That seemed insane since I was already north of Boston but now that more trips are going to NYC I don't see a way around it. God help New York City if I show up in my plaid bell bottom pants and silk shirt claiming to be from the future with a message about climate change. I will be immediately arrested. Meanwhile Memphis is under water thanks to coal energy plants and Chinese dildo manufacturers.

This is getting very complicated as it's more evident that I neither have the money nor the liver health to get to Labrador. And what further complicates things is the fact that single serving lifestyles is contributing to the environmental holocaust and that I am going to have to hire myself and my van out to drive people and goods from quebec up to labrador to the Eskimo villages to validate the trip. At the same time documenting the whole affair for a climate change video.

It's up to fate since I can't justify paying greyhound with their awful gas mileage and empty seats. We all have to carpool and cram the vehicle full like Haitians.


Anonymous said...

Haitians die in hasty rafts disguised as boats, plan accordingly

- sober Ken

mo_positive said...

How about a corporate sponsored rescue mission to Labrador? Try SC Johnson, I hear they fuel their plant with methane from a landfill. Not sure where they get all the oil for their plastic bottles, though...

Or, convert that bus to biodiesel. Fuel up at grease traps all the way to Labrador.

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Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.