Saturday, October 8, 2011

Top 10 Comments that Have Nothing to Do With Meaning of Life

1. I wake up every morning feeling like I was in a car accident in my dreams and my spine was injured.
2. If you have arthritis in your dreams does that mean you'll have it when you wake up? In my case: Yes.
3. I've invested in muscle building supplements called Creatine and Glutamine as the depletion of my body is like the federal reserves being plundered to bail out Greek Gyro cooks.
4. I wake up...wait, I already said that one.
5. My memory is so bad I have to check my blog to find out what I did yesterday. So, I lie to make it appear I accomplished more. This false sense of achievement is the basis of the global economy.
6. My brain thinks I'm 24 years old and my back thinks my brain belongs to someone else.
7. My cock has had his number retired.
8. I pawned my balls at the Hawk Shop for $11 but then bought $10 worth of losing scratch tickets. I spent the last dollar on viewing privileges for my balls.
9. I'm a snob with bad taste.
10. I think looking at motorcycles for sale is "doing something".
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Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.