denver

not an easy trip to denver. but I didn't kill any badgers or other rodents along the way. a rat or mouse is now living with me in the van, eating my fruit, but that will have to stop. I have no extra food to give to a rat.
Nevada, Utah, Wyoming, Colorado. These are nice states. I've driven down this road before...really following my own footsteps as the song goes. Roamed and Rambled. But there is a purpose and my self destructive fixation on perfection isn't haunting me as much. Lately I pondered the meaning of love. It's codependency, right? Ha ha. But I'm going to sort that out one day. It's an easy world for the bold and a perilous one for the meek. A coward dies a hundred deaths...a brave man dies but one. I think that applies to all realms of activity.

so. onward...this is a brief stop in Denver. It looks to be a solo trip east after giving a guy named Ben a ride here from S.F.
Ben may have been Athena disguised as a hapless hitchhiker. As a test. You know, Zeus, god of all gods, is the protector of strangers and travelers. keep that in mind. Athena likes to disguise herself to trick us up. Do her wrong and they gods will get you back.

it's all there in the Odyssey.

here's a picture of Athena in the form of Ben...

shoe fetish blues

a talk with jon

on our way north to "get tipsy"

this night ended in a series of arguments and gladiator bouts...

s.f.

A low point or high point depending on how you look at it.
Some other pics violated my photo album terms and conditions so you can't see those yet...

ALl I remember is hearing Jon tell a homeless guy, "I will pay you $5 to piss on your recyclables." and the homeless dude didn't hesitate. "piss all you want. hell yeah."
I was thinking that something had gone horribly wrong with the world.
Then Jon started to piss and many angry screams followed. This wasn't an alley, this was a very busy sidewalk full of labor day revelers. ANd Jon was misbehaving...badly and defending it with violence.
Later in the night Jon offered a man $5 to fight in the street "to the death."
and if you think Jon's girlfriend thought this was all funny, think again. No. IT was all bad.
We ended up next to a fire hydrant, sleeping,waiting for the cops to get off the street.
"What did I do wrong?" asked Jon innocently.
I sighed...
you decide for yourself...




this photo was deleted by request...

If you look very closely you will see that Jon is only wearing socks...
this video was deleted by request













the contents of my pockets:



jon's accounts... I like the "gas? food?" note...


this is how it all began...

Kerouac Nights...beat...who put the lights out?

The ride share did not go as planned.I know that's surprising.
Turned out that instead of a serial killer I ended up with three women in the van. All of us were terrified. One wrong move and I would get maced...or pepper sprayed...and they were waiting for that one wrong move.
awful. awkward. tense.

one fell asleep in my bed. the other fell asleep in her chair. The third called her husband and told her to start driving from the bay area and pick her up as soon as possible.
ugh.

I didn't know if we were going to make it. honestly, the van does not appreciate the hate those women threw at it. neither did I. night driving. hundreds of trucks driving madly past us. exhaustion. anxiety. a gigantic hill. threat of blowouts...and engine failure.

I had planned for a funny and revealing picture of the four of us at a truck stop or in front of a house. This is the spot where that picture would go. but there would be no picture. not after the first girl bailed half way. That took the fun out of it. the second girl said, "let's just get going."

not at all the attitude I needed.

"The third girl woke up and said, "who wants condoms?" she was from Venice...surprise!
So no picture. Maybe I'll draw up what I saw. or explain it. The first girl (venice) was wearing yoga clothes and after handing me condoms said she was menstruating every two weeks.
I said, "Those girls are waiting."

The second girl is a USC student. Sociology. studying parent child relationships in prisoners. OK. She took a copy of my ID and registration can texted her family every 20 minutes. if she missed a text the police would be informed immediately.

the third girl. JEsus. what a mistake. Simi valley Indian princess. A software engineer. Brilliant. wearing a spotless silk Sari. One look at the van stopped her dead in her tracks.
"Look, " I said, "you get to sit on the ice cooler. But let me get a beer out of it first. Ha ha. just kidding."
she didn't laugh or say a word. But she did text her husband. "SAVE ME. HURRY>"

Then came the awful drive. I don't want to relive it.
4 am. lost in North Beach following the footsteps of Kerouac and Brad. Brad! Where are you now. help me find my way.

"Could you pull over. I'm going to be sick" said Venice girl.

ugh. I didn't know where the richmond district was. I could only see the lights of trucks passing in the night. my vision was shot. I was wired.

"Do you want to fuck?" she asked.

"No, baby. I'm too tired. I can't see. My balls are asleep."

"Let me out here."

Ok.
she 's gone into the k beat fog. we all made it to where we were going. But I actually don't believe that is the important thing. Aren't we all going to end up somewhere. it is the process that is important. And these girls were not on my side as far as the process goes.

then I fall asleep in my van after hunting for a parking spot for two hours.
and that was the part of the trip that made sense. after that it just got ugly...as some later posts will show.