Monday, September 7, 2009

Kerouac Nights...beat...who put the lights out?

The ride share did not go as planned.I know that's surprising.
Turned out that instead of a serial killer I ended up with three women in the van. All of us were terrified. One wrong move and I would get maced...or pepper sprayed...and they were waiting for that one wrong move.
awful. awkward. tense.

one fell asleep in my bed. the other fell asleep in her chair. The third called her husband and told her to start driving from the bay area and pick her up as soon as possible.

I didn't know if we were going to make it. honestly, the van does not appreciate the hate those women threw at it. neither did I. night driving. hundreds of trucks driving madly past us. exhaustion. anxiety. a gigantic hill. threat of blowouts...and engine failure.

I had planned for a funny and revealing picture of the four of us at a truck stop or in front of a house. This is the spot where that picture would go. but there would be no picture. not after the first girl bailed half way. That took the fun out of it. the second girl said, "let's just get going."

not at all the attitude I needed.

"The third girl woke up and said, "who wants condoms?" she was from Venice...surprise!
So no picture. Maybe I'll draw up what I saw. or explain it. The first girl (venice) was wearing yoga clothes and after handing me condoms said she was menstruating every two weeks.
I said, "Those girls are waiting."

The second girl is a USC student. Sociology. studying parent child relationships in prisoners. OK. She took a copy of my ID and registration can texted her family every 20 minutes. if she missed a text the police would be informed immediately.

the third girl. JEsus. what a mistake. Simi valley Indian princess. A software engineer. Brilliant. wearing a spotless silk Sari. One look at the van stopped her dead in her tracks.
"Look, " I said, "you get to sit on the ice cooler. But let me get a beer out of it first. Ha ha. just kidding."
she didn't laugh or say a word. But she did text her husband. "SAVE ME. HURRY>"

Then came the awful drive. I don't want to relive it.
4 am. lost in North Beach following the footsteps of Kerouac and Brad. Brad! Where are you now. help me find my way.

"Could you pull over. I'm going to be sick" said Venice girl.

ugh. I didn't know where the richmond district was. I could only see the lights of trucks passing in the night. my vision was shot. I was wired.

"Do you want to fuck?" she asked.

"No, baby. I'm too tired. I can't see. My balls are asleep."

"Let me out here."

she 's gone into the k beat fog. we all made it to where we were going. But I actually don't believe that is the important thing. Aren't we all going to end up somewhere. it is the process that is important. And these girls were not on my side as far as the process goes.

then I fall asleep in my van after hunting for a parking spot for two hours.
and that was the part of the trip that made sense. after that it just got some later posts will show.

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Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.