Kicking a Technogenetic Stud Horse

I know I said I would leave Steve Jobs alone but I just can't do it. SOMEONE HAS TO STAND UP TO THIS MONSTER!
He basically sees the world as incomplete without his devices. What kind of insane arrogance is that? Like all this mercury and gold WAS JUST WAITING for him to come along and refine it. Am I the only one who reads "The Glass Bead Game" and notices the absence of high tech devices? Castalia is like the opposite of Apple Corp. Castalia refines the man...always the man and the mind. Never the mercury. Fuck the mercury! I'll examine nothing before I examine myself. That's their motto. And it turns out that examining yourself, your worldview, your philosophy is enough for one life. There's no time for micro engineering. The violin, meditation, universal themes. The Apple approach to living is so completely backwards I can't believe it. I'm certain it represents a gross absence of spiritual reflection in our culture that we would find comfort and completion in highly refined electronics. I KNOW these are related. It's a surrogate spirituality and, as I've said before, Jobs is Guru. If only there were another planet to plunder! If only more than 20% of the earth was habitable! If only Jobs had a trace amount of self reflection!
Man, the chain of events to allow this catastrophe to happen is really incredible. I almost think someone planned it. Having Fox news, FOX NEWS, try to inform people??? Having a brand new nation be controlled by slave owning business owners from day 1 AND have access to almost all valuable natural resources. The only living model of sustainable living, a diverse, continent wide civilization, IS MASSACRED in less than 100 years from the country's birth AND ALL TRACE IS EXPUNGED FROM HISTORY! Did I mention FOX NEWS is a source of information?? I would trust Joseph Goebbels before I trusted Fox News. And yet, there they are running press releases for Apple Corp. Is this real? Is this some kind of dream? Is Fox News sponsored by Apple Corp? Only by a complete suppression of truth would Apple be allowed to operate. That's my role here. I have to get the truth out about what they are doing. Because it is one thing to just not tell the truth, but Fox News is actually promoting lies and disinformation and just useless gossip. That's their role. Someone probably mapped it out in a board room.

"Ok, Fox News will be the disinformation and propaganda specialists. We want lots and lots of celebrity gossip, lottery winners, lost cats, sports and commercials for our sponsors. CNN will pose as the in depth journalists but really they should just do product safety tests and exposes on teen prostitution. Better yet, lets get teen prostitutes to be anchor women. What? Is that too much?"

Oh, please let me be wrong about all this. I'd be glad if there were any evidence I'm wrong. How can I describe it? If Karl Rove can be so smart as to package a president out of a sub literate stock boy then you have to believe there are smart people out there doing things behind your back. There are pickpockets who steal your wallet and then there are the big thieves who steal cultures. The good ones do it without anyone noticing. You see...oh, wait, gotta go, The Simpsons are on!

Chess: Board games for smart people.

I have overcome my computer solitaire addiction by replacing it with a more complicated and painful addiction called computer chess. The chess board I have is a computer and you follow the readout and put the computer's pieces where it wants them to go. You push down on the space to activate it and register that you have acted as the computer's arms. It's like playing a very very smart and quiet handicapped person.
The computer has 73 skill levels. I started out playing against 15 and would lose in a maximum of 11 moves. It was an absolute slaughter. Many many times at night I would scratch my head and look at the boards and mumble, "You dirty motherfucker. You think you're so smart. Never any mistakes for you. So superior. Oh, one day..."

so I finally figured out about the level thing and I put it on level 1 and the computer would just randomly move the rook back and forth for no reason. I beat his ass all over the place. Then up to level 2. He was a little more strategic but I still won every game.
then to level 3. It took some work to win but I could do it and I felt so good when the screen said "I lose"
I'd celebrate with a little dance.
then to level 4 which is actually a perfect pairing. I have to play my absolute best to beat him. If I make one or two mistakes I lose. But once I won two or three times in a row (without using the 'take back' feature) I moved up to level 5.
Level 5 has me weeping like a little child. My blood pressure goes up when seemingly by magic EVERY SQUARE I WANT TO MOVE TO IS COVERED. That's the dirty trick. The computer won't put you in jeopardy every move, but it will work it so you can't move without a rain of terror falling on your head. So then I think, "I'll just move this innocent pawn. Nothing bad will happen then. There is no...wha? What the fuck. You moved THERE? Why? I'll just...wha??? No!!!! THERE'S NOTHING I CAN DO!
See, it's like after the first 5 opening move I am completely assaulted and attacked. I'm on the defense and nothing I can do stops the attack.
This last game I held on until I had a king and a pawn and he had a king and a knight and a pawn. I lost. That was as close as it got.
When I beat level 5 straight up it will be a miracle. Chess is such a weird thing because how do you get better? I can't get any smarter but there are so many options to choose from and the computer always pics the right one and I always pick the wrong one. How do I get better? Lately, I just mirror the moves the computer makes...and I still lose. I'll play again in a minute. I can't be afraid. Level 73 must be hard.


Of course, moments after I typed that I decided to give level 73 a try. And I must've channeled Bobby Fisher because about 50 minutes later I queened a pawn and cornered the king. I think the battery was weak so it wasn't thinking clearly but I still had to play phenomenal chess. The trick was to be aggressive and take the pieces that he ordinarily abuses me with. But take them strategically. I might have used the take back button once. That's a good game of chess. I wonder if this has a replay function so I can post my win on a chess forum. grandmasters would probably say, what the hell kind of strategy is this? It's the man in the van strategy. I verbally abused the computer and played it when the battery was low. The X factor wins again!



I beat level 5 too! The computer's ego has been bruised.

midnight rant

A pointless rant that I thought had more of an uplifting message when I started. I keep thinking I'm going to look in the mirror and see no more grey in my beard. I mean, who doesn't do this? I think, today is the day I will wake up from this horrible nightmare that has me getting progressively, insidiously older and more frail. So I go to the bathroom and look and instead of less grey, I see more grey. I see grey beard hair, head hair (what's left of it) and chest hair. I found some white hair on my pillow. What skanky old woman was sleeping here? I thought... Wait, it's mine!
Oh, Christ!
So I thought, since this is unstoppable and everyone from Gary Cooper to Gandhi ended up dead I had better get fit and stay fit for as long as I can. Not because I think that will stave off death's cold hand, but because it is the only way to make life tolerable. God, I hate resembling characters in American Beauty. I'm sure having children is the best way to distract yourself from the crumbling infrastructure that is your body.
Am I the only one who has a hard time getting off the floor? Or am I the only one who falls down for no reason?
I sometimes think that I'll exert less energy and thus slow down the aging process. Like I'll meditate for the remainder of my life and thus stay young. Has anyone give this a try?
I guess listening to Kai Winding and Bert Kaempfert instrumentals from 1963 doesn't help. They're just so good! Someone go listen to Spanish Flea by Herb Alpert and keep their face from not smiling. Here, just try not smiling...




Since the music has no video you can read while you listen. Here's some inappropriate content to go along with the upbeat trumpet tune that summons another era...

The five popularized stages of death are:
Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Depression
Acceptance

Dabda is the Acronym. What's a good mnemonic?
Doesn't Anyone Buy Dildos Anymore?
Don't Ask Bobby Dylan Anything.
Dentists Are Better Drinking Anise
Death Always Beats Down Alcoholics

Make your own one up, it's fun!
So help me figure out what stage I'm in? I hear you say, "Oggy, you aren't dying." Then I would say you are in Denial. You are telling me that I'm not dying because you don't want to believe that YOU are dying. Then you would get Angry. Then you would try to reason with me (Bargaining). Then you'd get Depressed. Then you would Accept that we are both dying. I mean, seriously, look at yourself in the mirror. Take a good look. Does that look like someone who isn't dying? I didn't think so. ACCEPT IT.
I think my new get fit plan is really Bargaining. I'm trying to cheat death. "No, look. I'm serious about living now. Please. I want Mary back!" So I should just be a fat bastard? No! But I'm past the anger phase. And I'm not in denial like you.


Does anyone want to do radio theater with me? It's perfect for non actors or camera shy folk like myself. No improve, we'll just write out a script. Heck, we can start with my workday story. Or we'll do a funny one about death.

Father/Son Duo Fail to See Eye to Eye For Record 70th Year

Indianapolis

93 year old Doug Mitchell and his son Lance proudly announced to the Indianapolis Sun that they have been at odds for 70 years.
“He says seventy, I say sixty-nine,” said Lance Mitchell, now 71 years old. “But who’s counting?”
“I am,” shouted Mitchell senior. “I’m counting and this all started in 1940 when you wouldn’t stop crying.”
“Whatever, pop. You know everything. You’re always right.”
“What? What did you say?”
“His hearing is going and so is his memory. Trust me.”
“Trust you? Like I trusted you with my car?”

The story goes that when a teenage Lance wanted to borrow his father’s 1950 Plymouth Sedan to take his friends to the quarry. He ran out of gas and the car ended up in a ditch.
“What did I tell you before you left?”
“To have a good time?”
“No, I said, ‘Make sure you fill her up.’ That’s what I said. Your mother even heard me. 'Fill her up.’”
Mabel Mitchell passed away in 2002 so she could not corroborate her husband’s claim.
“That’s bullshit! You don’t even know what you’re talking about. All day long, the bullshit just flies out of your mouth.”
“Bullshit? I’ll tell you what bullshit is. Your college degree. I tell him to go the Navy, to get into a trade and what does he do? Nothing. Just wastes his life.”
“I wouldn’t call a History degree from the University of Chicago doing nothing.”
“Of course you wouldn’t. You actually think it’s useful. He's proud of it.”

The two have been arguing about life choices, politics, religion, and sports longer than any father and son in history, shattering the previous record held by Tom Scheib and his son Tom Jr. of Schenectady N.Y. The Scheibs had been arguing for 58 years before Tom Jr. shot and killed his father in an argument over the proper way to change the oil in his truck.

“They didn’t have the endurance,” mused Lance Mitchell. “Most fathers and sons reach a status of quiet resentment. Like a truce. They will bitch to their respective spouses about each other but when they are in a room together they don’t argue. They don’t even speak except to say Merry Christmas or goodbye. If it weren’t for football most sons would completely disown their fathers. Me and dad aren’t like that. We’re not quitters.”
“So why did your marriage fail?”
“Pop, she died,” Lance explained. His wife Sherry passed away in 1997.
“Oh, you and your excuses. One after another. He’s got an answer for everything.”

Diane Belluci, author of Fathers and the Sons who Hate Them, said it is not unusual for fathers and sons to argue.
“This trademark of the male relationship has its roots in biology. The pack leader, the dominant male, must earn that position. When the breakdown in traditional communities and families occurred after the Second World War, males were left with the impotent positions of assembly and grunt work. The leadership roles that made this country great became archaic and males turned their aggression on each other.”
Belluci explained that record setting dysfunction like that of the Mitchell Duo is not to be admired.
“We can learn something from the petty, immature hell that rules their lives, but no one should seek to emulate their intolerable relationship. No. This is not a record to be proud of. They are an extremely unusual, maladaptive pair and they should get help immediately.”

“I’ll get help when Lance grows up,” declared Doug Mitchell. “Not one minute earlier.”
Lance rolled his eyes. “The problem is that I don’t like him. He’s got a big mouth. He doesn’t know when to shut up. From my choice in girlfriends to my preference for baseball over football, it’s always been a battle. He’s a product of his generation.”
“Baseball is for sissies...."
Doug Mitchell paused to suck oxygen from a home respirator. He has suffered from emphysema for a decade.
"If you like baseball then you’re a sissy.”
“Not everyone can be a longshoreman, dad.”
“That’s sissy talk,” Doug wheezed.
“Did you even know what was in those boats you worked on? Are you that ignorant?”
“I did my job. That’s all I did.”
“So you admit you’re ignorant.”
“I admit you’re an idiot. Why can’t you be like your brother?”
Lance's older brother Tim has been estranged for 20 years.
"We think he's in jail," said Lance.
"At least he had guts and ambition," added Doug.

Doug and Lance Mitchell didn’t want to discuss the secret of their seven decades of disputes. Arguing had become as natural to them as swimming for a fish or flying for a bird.
“It’s a way of life. I’d say I was happy with it but my father would just contradict me.”
“Won’t you ever shut up?” asked Doug. “Hand me the remote control.”
Lance looked at two remote controls on the coffee table.
“This one?”
“Yeah, you got shit in your ears?”

Lance looked murderously at his father and then slowly handed him the remote control.
“You’re welcome,” said Lance as the silence in the room was broken by the blaring television volume. "I wouldn't take that kind of crap from anyone but my dad," he added.



Memorable Quotes:
"What was silent in the father speaks in the son, and often I found in the son the unveiled secret of the father." Friedrich Nietzsche

"Every father should remember that one day his son will follow his example instead of his advice."

"Love and fear. Everything the father of a family says must inspire one or the other." ~Joseph Joubert

"A father carries pictures where his money used to be."

"When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years." ~Mark Twain

"Mother, I'm going to get my things and get out of this house. Father hates me and I'm never coming back." Marvin Gaye...moments before his father shot him to death.

"The child is the father of the man."

"You know nothing!" Father to his son.

I'll dedicate this to handyman Al and Cora who are now proud owners of a baby boy named Desmond.

survival of the fittest as it applies to technogenetics

Nat King Cole trio is fit. It's polished...it may as well be live because these cats don't miss a note. They survive.
I'm finishing The Creation: An Appeal to Save Life on Earth by E.O. Wilson. It's filling in the gaps in my universal theory of existence.

I've called Steve Jobs a diabolical, evil, cunning, murderous, and reckless programmer of humanity. But maybe I'm being unfair. Maybe he is really a technogenetic stud. That's not a word yet but I want to be the first to define it. Steve Jobs basically is impregnating humanity with his technological genes. He's creating new Apple users...people dependent on Apple. Genes are biological, refined salts to be exact, DNA with inherited traits from parents. Now, the latest development has been a hybrid human with traits from mom and dad and Steve Jobs. The iPad is like a sickle-cell immunity. How has this happened? Technogenetic transpiration, of course. Yup, you heard it here first. Can I fault a man for finding a way to spread his genetic seed over copper wires? Yes, I can, because it is atrocious, abominable, inhuman.

But in the world of biology there is nothing wrong. There is only what is and what is not. Again, we always return to philosophy...and the theory of self determination. Are we subject to the whims of a techno sire like Steve Jobs? Or can we determine our fate, should we determine our fate? This is a topic for another day...maybe a topic for my master's thesis in metaphysics.