Wednesday, August 28, 2013

Al Jazeera America A Better Source of News?

It's a sign of the times that Al Jazeera, headquartered in Qatar, has become the best progressive news source for American current events. No, I don't mean Hannah Montana*, I mean actual news. Go ahead and comb through CNN's car and financial investment commercials for an article about the largest fast food strike in history planned for Friday, the day that none of you will sympathize with the workers and not buy fast food because you can't be your fucking prepackaged morals at Walmart.

CNN has no mention of the strike because it fails to fit Rupert Murdoch's agenda (McDonalds pays his bills) I'm sure Fox neglected to include it in their broadcast. So, a Middle Eastern news source, a source that actually broadcasts terrorist videos, is less biased, and more fact based than the more popular CNN. I shouldn't be surprised but I do have to be ashamed when I'm reading the news and an NSA suit walks up behind me.

Al Jazeera doesn't seem to be crawling with banal ads for junk food and erection drugs. One of their stories is about health problems of Native Americans. CNN has no mention of this. So I wonder if Al Jazeera made up the statistic that 1 in 3 Native American women would be raped in her lifetime? Diabetes, tuberculosis and alcoholism are a few of the problems facing the remnants of the American holocaust. FOX news reports that a cat got caught in a garbage truck...and survived.

FOX news and CNN continue to erode the foundations of a free society by polluting the culture with lies and misinformation, cherry-picked drivel for the consumption by lazy and thoughtless diabetics. You want to learn what's happening in America? Ask someone from Arabia. They are better informed than your average pedophile school bus driver. I'm really amused that someone would criticize Al Jazeera because it might be influenced by the government. Have they not seen five minutes of FOX covering an election?

So, in order to unite in solidarity with the low paid wage slaves of Church's chicken I'm going to have to cite Al Jazeera as the source of my information. George Washington would be so proud.

I shouldn't complain; I have ultimate stripper cage wrestling tomorrow!

*Turns out I was totally wrong to attack Hannah's character back in the golden era of my blog. I called her trashy and even denounced her as the anti-christ. hahah But it turns out she's a real role model our daughters can all look up to on their way to being Disney sponsored interracial gangbang queens. Talentless Underage Stripper Shakes Scrawny Ass, Wins Award and Praise. We've invited the devil to dinner.

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Man in the Van by Oggy Bleacher is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial 3.0 Unported License.